The worry pattern that looms large over you today, actually started as a small – ‘It’s okay’ inside you. Read the following lines and see if this is what you do:
It’s okay to miss gym today. I have an errand to run.
It’s okay if I miss my appointment with a close friend, she will understand.
It’s okay if I don’t call my mom, who is expecting my call today.
It’s okay if I cheat on my diet today, after all I have been on a strict diet for the last 10 days.
The ‘it’s’ okay’ begins as a justification but ends up as big worrying pattern.
Worrying is basically the chaos between lack of integrity and inauthenticity.
When you fail to honour the word you give to yourself inside yourself and outside yourself to others, you start building layers of inauthenticity. Most of the time, we tell ourselves we will do this or we will do that and then we don’t even give ourselves the slightest respect of honouring those words. We forget about these words and after sometimes you even lose confidence in them. This forms the basis of your worry pattern.
Respect the words you give to yourself and others
This happens when we are living a largely unconscious life. We say things to ourselves and others carelessly, thinking that it doesn’t matter! We call ourselves names, we tell ourselves that we will behave in a certain way or we will honour certain commitments but when we repeatedly fail to honour them. A deep forgetfulness begins to develop.
For example, you have been wanting to go on a diet or eat healthy food. But after a day or two you go to the store and decide to buy a packet of junk food and indulge in it thinking ‘it’s okay’.
Unfortunately, it’s these little inauthentic actions that build up. If you have indulged in junk food one time and was conscious enough to realign yourself – it would be fine. But many times you do the same thing again and again and over time, you lose confidence in yourself. You begin to believe that you can never eat healthy or that you will never be healthy. Or worse, that you are incapable or not worthy! This leads to deeper and deeper problems. And you have now developed a big fat worry pattern. You worry about your health, wealth and relationships but forget that you started it all with – It’s okay!
THE Good NEWS!
The good news is that you started it and so you can end it.
You simply need to start bringing integrity and authenticity in your thinking immediately. And it is possible to start right now and discard your worrying pattern.
Do this short exercise:
1) Write down all aspects of your life that you have worry.
2) For all these worries, write down the words you have said to yourself or others and the actions you took.
3) Identify where you are not being in integrity. Examine where you gave your words and did not honour or fulfil them. Remember whenever you are not integrated with your inner and outer words you utter, worrying will become a pattern in you.
4) Look at your life and identify the things you forget most often. For example: you regularly forget to take your medicine. You forgot where you kept your car keys. Examine what are the words you gave in all these aspects where you are forgetful. Identify and write down where you are not in integrity with your words.
Watch this video discourse for a deeper understanding:
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